Sunday, July 14, 2019

The Year of Pride 2019


Gay Pride Day, has come and gone and so has Pride month but this year, 2019, the 50th anniversary of the Stonewall Rebellion, Pride celebration continues all year, all over the world.  Vashon Heritage Museum joins this worldwide celebration with their current LGBTQ exhibit entitled, “In and Out, Being LGBTQ on Vashon.”  The exhibit plans events throughout the year celebrating Vashon’s LGBTQ’s community.

As part of this yearlong celebration the exhibit, Vashon Heritage Museum and the Senior Center is sponsoring a film series at the Vashon Theater and Senior Center.  The first film, After Stonewall, was shown June 24th.  As a member of the Advisory Committee for the LGBTQ exhibit I was asked to introduce the film.  Being a conciseness person, I reviewed the movie which I hadn’t seen in years. Watching the film, I was struck by how much the movie moved me even today, not only about my past but about my community’s past.  The movie tells the story of the LGBTQ community’s coming out echoing the coming out stories in the “In and Out” exhibit and the stories I’ve heard over the years, not only from people, but communities and organizations too.

These memories were sparked during my work on the “In and Out” exhibit.  Oral histories of LGBTQ members in our Vashon community are part of this exhibit and are on display for all the community to hear. Listening to them I learned stories about people I have known for years. Stories that have gotten buried with years of living.  The “In and Out” exhibit mined so much history for all us to hear, see and enjoy. History, that seemed forgotten or lost, shines through

The exhibit and the film After Stonewall makes the point that coming out is a life time endeavor.  Thinking about my recent walk on the Camino de Santiago in this context I realize that every time I talked about my “spouse” and people assumed she was a he I had to make the choice of coming out or not coming out.  I did come out to the close group of friends that I consistently walked with for the 486 miles but not everyone I met.  I’ve been out for over 40 years and still I make this choice almost every time I meet some one for the first time.

Seeing After Stonewall brought up memories of some of the significant coming out moments in my live time. At Green Peace as the bookkeeper letting my follow coworkers know that my partner was a woman, or the time when I got pregnant through alternative insemination and had a woman partner answering the question over and over again of how I got pregnant.  Or the time after 16 years of being with my partner having asked my family ask how long we’d been together as if we had just gotten together. Somehow, they didn’t remember her from all those times I brought “My Friend,” to family gatherings.  Then my I brought “My Partner” to family gatherings.  All these identities my partner and I took on over the years depending on what we perceived as acceptable were stages in our coming out process. 

Even our children go through these processes of coming out.  My daughter when she starts to date a new person asks if they have a problem with her having gay parents.  As she put it, “This is a deal breaker if they have a problem with it.” Actually, when I think about it, my whole family goes through a coming out process.  Years ago, my sister gave a chunk of change to the Pride Foundation.  I found out about it because she had a postcard on her refrigerator from the Pride Foundation and to my surprise it had my faster daughter’s photograph on the front.  I asked her where she got the postcard and that’s when she told me about her contribution.  To me having this postcard on her refrigerator was a message to all my her friends that she accepts her gay sister and identifies as a “Gay Ali.”

These stories of members of my community and my family are ripples in the years of my community’s coming out story that extends way beyond any closet I ever dreamed of when I first told the first person that I was a lesbian.  These stories continue today and I am reminded coming out is a life time endeavor.  And as the LGBTQ community continues to spread love as a good thing, I think of the words from the poem, “The River Gold.” written by a Vashon gay man, Don Paulson where he refers to the strength of our community as a lovely stream, “Who would think a lovely stream could sweeten a bitter sea.”  Thank you, Vashon Heritage Museum, for coming out as an Ali of the Vashon Gay Community.

For events celebrating the LGBTQ community look on the Vashon Heritage Museum’s website at; https://vashonheritagemuseum.org/

No comments: